WHAT IS A TRUE FRIENDSHIP?

Friendship is faith, trust, joy, fun, creating something together.

Friendship is true, when it is not always based upon ego, it is true when it is open and others are allowed to become friends with your friend.

It is true when it has some positive cause but it is hampered when it is developed for some selfish motive.  

It is true when friend is always available for you in all your challenges and in any odd times. But it is not true, when fake reasons are given to keep friendship going.

Friendship based upon truth lasts longer.

 MINEIN :1

When two friends come together for a good cause they create something beautiful.

 TRY THIS ACTIVITY

1.    For this activity, you need one A4 size paper, two pencils, one table and two chairs or you also can sit down to perform this activity.

2.    A paper will be kept between both of you and you both will start drawing on it.  Both will be drawing on the same paper and on the same topic.

3.    It has been observed that Initially people have torn at least one paper, asked for making two halves of the paper, not become easily ready to draw on the same topic. Showed less amount of trust. And that also loosen their confidence.

4.    Let it happen in the beginning for some time; and then give them a minute to think for a while.  And Start again.

5.    Many of them find out way to complete the task. And take the challenge quite well. Some of them still have problems. May be the other friend is taking more paper, more space or something like this or the common complaint is, other person is spoiling the drawing. Just observe whatever is happening.

6.    Discuss and Debrief.

Every reaction, there is a new scope for learning.

MINEIN : 2

A True friend is that who connects.

 What does research say?

:: CHARACTERISTICS OF SOCIAL CONNECTIONS AND HAPPINESS ::

• Loving relationships are crucial to our well-being and happiness.

• Connections and relationships create space for safety and support that help us to explore and learn more. 

• We can build more resources and cope up appropriately with stress and adversity.

• Self - worth is validated. 

• Diverse ideas and influences help us to grow and become successful.

• Fun, care and celebration of good times.

• People with strong social connections have less stress-related health problems, lower risk of mental illness, and faster recovery from trauma. 

• Healthy life-style habits are promoted.

• Psychologist James H. Fowler studied the data of 5,000 people over 20 years and found that happiness benefits other people through three degrees of connection, and that the effects last for a year. 

• He says, " We found a statistical relationship not just between your happiness and your friends' happiness, but between your happiness and your friends' friends' happiness."

• The concept "hedonic adaption" is may be an exception here.  Hedonic Adaption is that, joys of loves and trimphs and sorrows of losses and humiliation fade with time. 

• In contrast to material goods, we are more likely to continue to want our close relationships, even after we attain them, and to continue to derive positive emotions from them. 

• Christakis suggests that, “There is a new kind of hierarchy we might think about as policymakers and social scientists. It’s not just whether you are rich or poor, black or white, urban or rural. It’s also about where you are located in the network.”

• Zen Habits, by Leo Babauta, He mentions that, with connections we also meet with new opportunities, collaborations and emergence of new creation which was not before there. 

• He also explains the importance being open for new people and thoughts. And coming real with other people rather than just a knowledgeable, smart, accomplished and funny person. That is also true but not completely true so, there is a danger that these things may hinder in the process of being a true friend and create true connections. Sometimes being vulnerable is not bad. That shows trust among all other new strange people. And that may also increase the possibility of trustworthy, deeper connections and long-lasting better friendships. 

So be a good friend, be real, be vulnerable, be connected. Have a great friendship day. 

Google Images : 1

Resourses: 

http://zenhabits.net/connect/

http://www.pbs.org/thisemotionallife/topic/connecting/connection-happiness

https://edge.org/panel/nicholas-christakis-the-science-of-social-connections-headcon-13-part-v

Images ( first 2) : From MinEin : Mindfulness Emotional Intelligence Program.

Be You. Be Your Own Leader.

Be You . Be Your Own Leader.

 a message to a daughter and a son by their ma and pa and also to anyone who is striving hard and moving forward with his / her own effort....

When a person strives hard for the best in life and gets it then what he / she wants. That’s like a glory of life. Everything is set then. Sometimes feels like nothing is remained to achieve more. But No. It’s actually beginning of your new life. It’s New life altogether. That also brings Transition in your life. But always remember that Change is Inevitable, it is ought to happen and now it is happening for Betterment of your life. Progress of our life. Growth and Development of our life. And it is there to add value and meaning in your efforts.

I found people thinking that, “ Why did they strived so hard? If they wouldn’t have strived hard then  they wouldn’t have to face this difficult time in life.”  But Who decides difficulty of time? And how can we be so sure that if ever efforts were not been taken then there will be no difficulty?   The situation can become even worse when no efforts are there than striving hard and taking efforts.

How about Thanking life which is passed by , and also thanking and welcoming  new phase of your life. This phase in your life  is there to check and recheck :: Who You Are? What is your Purpose of Life? What Principals of Life you have? If you know everything already then this is there to recheck. And Thank for giving this particular opportunity, thank for Meeting with new people, knowing new cultures and food, Thank for  Given a chance to prove yourselves. Now and always. 

Be You . Be Your Own Leader...

Was checking with a video clip and I found this one… Have a look. Please share anything you think about it...

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SlpYdoZoSOI

Life is like a painting of which you are the painter.

Life is like a painting. And You are the Painter. So You will decide what colors you want in the painting. 

It is said that Painting of life is decided. But NO. It is not correct. Believe in yourself. Have faith in yourself. 

जीवन एका चित्राप्रमाणे आहे आणि  चित्रकार तू आहेस. तुला ठरवायचं कोणते रंग तुझ्या चित्रात तुला हवेत ते. असं म्हणतात कि जीवनाचं चित्र हे ठरलेलं असत.   पण नाही ते बरोबर नाही, तुझ्यावर विश्वास ठेव , भरवसा ठेव. 

You are the creator. Painting of your life depends upon what colors you pour in it. Grey or all other colors. Colors of Pain or Colors of Strength. Colors of Guilt or Colors of voice. Colors of sadness or Colors of glitter. Colors of mourning or Colors of dignity. Colors of happiness or Colors of Gloomy. Colors of Blue or Colors of Guts and Courage.

तूच आहेस निर्माता. तुझ्या चित्राचा. तुझ्या जीवनाचे हे चित्र अवलंबून आहे तू जे रंग तुझ्या चित्रात भरणार त्यावर. राखाडी कि बाकीचे सगळे रंग त्यावर. दुःखाचे रंग कि शक्तीचे. अपराधाचे  कि भाष्य करण्याचे, व्यक्त होण्याचे,  वाईट वाटण्याचे कि चमक असलेले, सुतकी कि गौरवाचे, आनंदाचे कि खिन्नतेचे, निराशेचे  कि हिम्मत आणि धैर्याचे.  

Select your own colors. Select your own Strokes.  Make your own Painting. If ever Painting is already done. Keep a Courage to CHANGE it whenever it is required. And design it, Create it as you want it. 

तू ठरव तुझे रंग. तू ठरव तुझे रंगांचे फटकारे. बनव तुझं स्वतःच चित्र. जरी चित्र आधीच तयार असल, तरी ते बदलण्याची हिम्मत ठेव जेव्हाही तुला गरज पडेल तेव्हा. आणि नवीन रचना नवीन नक्षी बनव जशी तुला हवी आहे तशी. 

Do not loose Hope and Smile. Do not forget the colors of thanking. Just thank and move forward. Thank life which is already over. Because of our past, we learn a a a lot in our life. Just Grace the learning. And move forward.

फक्त उमेद आणि हास्य लोप पावू देऊ नकोस. धन्यवाद द्यायला विसरू नकोस. धन्यवाद दे आणि पुढील मार्गक्रमण चालू ठेव. जे आधीच तुझ्या जीवनात आहे त्या चित्राला धन्यवाद दे. आपल्या भूतकाळामुले आपण  आपल्या जीवनात खुउउउपच शिकतो. त्या भूतकाळालाही धन्यवाद दे आणि चल पुढे.  

And also do not forget to add a small window of light in your painting. 

आणिक एक .... एक गोष्ट विसरू नकोस एक छोटी प्रकाश पाझरणारी खिडकी त्या चित्रात असू दे. 

Have a look at both the paintings up and down. Which one or more than one you want. The things you want think about them consistently. You will get the same feelings. And you will start adding those colors in your painting. With all those colors add all those actions. Which will take you to your own marvelous journey. This will be your journey. Select it. Be there to live every moment of your own selection now onwards. Enjoy the process. Remember the colors of support are just a receiver away. :)

ह्या लेखातील कोणते चित्र तुला हवे आहे चारही चित्र नीट बघ. एक निवडायचं कि एकापेक्षा जास्त ते तू ठरव. तुला ज्या गोष्टी हव्या आहेत त्याचा सतत विचार करत राहा, तुला अगदी तसंच वाटत राहील आणि तशाच भावना तुझ्यात उत्पन्न होत राहतील. आणि ते रंग तू तुझ्या चित्रात भरशील. मग तू त्या रंगांबरोबरच तू ते विचार कधी प्रत्यक्षात आणशील ते तुझं तुलाही समजणार नाही. आणि ते रंग, त्या भावना,  ते विचार, आणि त्या कृती तुला एका वेगळ्या सुंदर प्रवासाला नेतील. तो तुझा स्वतःचा प्रवास असेल. त्यात तू निवड कर. त्या प्रवासातील क्षण जग. आताही आणि पुढेही. ह्या प्रक्रियेचि मजा घे. लक्षात असू दे कि मदतीचे रंग हे फक्त एका दूरध्वनी पलीकडे आहेत. :)

Life is like a Painting. But it changes when you choose appropriate colors. Design it with Appropriate Colors. Add a window of light. And just bring it into present to live it. YOU CAN DO IT.

आपलं जीवन हे चित्राप्रमाणेच आहे. पण ते बदलू शकत तेव्हाच जेव्हा तू नवीन योग्य रंगांची निवड करशील. नवीन नक्षी कर तुझ्या नव्याने निवडलेल्या त्या योग्य रंगांनी त्यात एक तेजाची खिडकी पण असू दे. आणि ते प्रत्यक्ष जीवनात जग. 

तूला हे नक्की करता येईल. 

Author

Arati Suryawanshi

9/8/14 edited 28/5/20