Happy New Year!

"  वर्ष गेले जुने वर्ष आले नवे 

भावनांचे पुन्हा तेच येती थवे 

अंबरा व्यापिले पाखरांच्या रवे 

रंगलो मी पुन्हा त्या स्मृतीच्या सवे "

      -----   यशवंतराव वझे 

          My father, Yashwantrao Vaze wrote this poem decades ago. Via this poem, he tries to give us a message,  that we have the power to bring back the good emotions and re live our past happy memories even today. 

This message is so apt even today that, There are so many things that are happening around us in this world. That feeling itself creates a dread in people and make them worried about their lives. 

That may loose their confidence and may also make them feel depressed. 

That may create irritability and over reactivity in their lives. 

But remember we all also have wonderful good memories in our past life, so we can try to relive with those memories. We can try to bring those beautiful emotions back in our lives. 

That can give us strength to live life with peace, love and abundance of contentment. 

Hoping that we all will be able to have old good, healthy, beautiful, happy memories in our life again. That will have the power to live them in present again with new people and new experiences.!!!

Have a wonderful happy new year!!!

An old photograph of my father and mother with all my sisters, my brother was yet to be arrived in the world then.

DIWALI, THE ROW OF LIGHTS, BRINGS  HAPPINESS TO MIND.

( आली  आली  दिवाळी  आली, मनात आनंदाची बरसात झाली. )

The true meaning of Diwali is Row of Diyas ( दिव्यांची ओळ ). It also has various different meanings to it. It is celebrated for the win of good over evil and light over darkness. It has auspicious and religious meaning too. 

But I always feel that, it comes just before new year and winter season (autumn)  in India; 

It brings a lot of beauty to life. Beauty of colourful things, Designs, Beauty of choice, Beauty of Giving, Beauty of expressing feelings of love and respect.  Now the whole world celebrates Diwali.

Diwali, is celebrated with an official holiday in India, Nepal, Sri Lanka, Myanmar, Mauritius, Guyana, Trinidad and Tobago, Suriname, Malaysia, Singapore, Fiji, Pakistan, and also in Australian External Territory of Chrismas Island. It is also celebrated in the White House on 5th of Nov. 2013.    (https://www.whitehouse.gov/the-press-office/2013/11/05/remarks-first-lady-diwali-celebration)

 

Diwali, brings New feelings and New energy to mind. 

The hot weather changes into cold wind. People all around get engaged in thinking about their holidays, families, shopping, and travels.

Beautiful Lanterns are seen everywhere.

Various beautiful, colourful hand made diyas wait for us in the market. 

People clean their houses and decorate with Rangawali and Diyas. Light is everywhere in Diwali. 

How about bringing light to our lives by celebrating it with our beloved people? 

How about bringing light to the lives of the people who need it, who are trying to see some light in their life ahead? 

We at Mindful Heart Consultancy try to connect more and more number of people to bring this light into their lives. And they bring it back to us with their beautiful feed backs, follow-ups and emails.

When the Client comes and says that, She/ He applied the important things from the last sessions in his /her life and that is how he/she kept going well in their life. That brings a bright light in his/her life and our lives too. By touching lives, our lives are filled up with many beautiful Diyas and their lights. 

The light which wins over darkness and AGYANA, takes us towards peace and success. 

Buddha Says, “The secret of health for both mind and body is not to mourn for the past, nor to worry about the future, but to live the present moment wisely and earnestly.” 

HAVE A GREAT GRAND SAFE DIWALI AND FESTIVE SEASON AHEAD.

Powered by : www.website.com

Visit our Website: www.mindfulheartconsultancy.com

Reactive Goals : No Access for Success

In the journey of life the best part is that, along the journey, we meet with beautiful human beings and minds and their hearts.

It is also about knowing new things from them.  Completely new sides of positivity and new sides of negativity, which I have never ever thought about. Unimaginable. So, today I want to write about Reactive Goals.

For me Reactive Goals are Goals when people have very limited goal in their hand. Very small, single directional, single thought only. That doesn't allow any other directions, any other thoughts, any other ideas or openness.

Their ideas about life are same as about people around them, about their leaders, about their managements. How does this happen? What takes place in their lives? But something happens this way, When people meet people and look at the situation through another persons Spectakles, which has single lense and that is also broken. Then this single directional, soul thought oriented approach takes place.

In this, They are not even aware about their own situation and what is happening with them?  The image is completely distorted. That becomes Scary. Scary for themselves. For their families and their lives. 

Because then they have a very limited, ristrictive, narrow, one sided, imcomplete approach for life, for people, for situations. And everything seem challenging and competitive to them. Then it becomes extremely untrustworthy. They may say NO to the situations which are important for them to grow.

They may even say NO for growth. And prefer NO access for success.

This is the completely unique situation I found which is not healthy at all. Which shows direct need of Well-being sessions in their lives.

Where as, at another side of the world, People are wearing decorative lenses to look at the world.

The complete approach is opposite. It looks beautiful. It is open, accepting, sharing, colourful. Multi directional, multi ideas are welcomed, various thoughts are discussed, analysed and then final decision is taken place.

That decision always takes people towards success. Because that involves emotional intelligence. They accept change, accept new ideas, open for new thoughts, with non-judgemental approach.  

They enjoy the process and whole journey with joy. They create positive energy  and spread it around. They know that their goals are meaningful. People around them start cooperating with them and helping with them.

They might not be fully aware about the situation but they accept it and try their best to become more aware about it.

They choose from the options available and also try their best to create new options for them. They choose. And

They give themselves the same which they choose and opt for their lives. As Optimism, Navigating emotions, and consequential thinking. They apply their consequential thinking for their success.

That is how they bring EQ WHEEL into action.

What do you choose for your life?

Visit our Website: www.mindfulheartconsultancy.com

Powered by www.website.com

WHAT IS A TRUE FRIENDSHIP?

Friendship is faith, trust, joy, fun, creating something together.

Friendship is true, when it is not always based upon ego, it is true when it is open and others are allowed to become friends with your friend.

It is true when it has some positive cause but it is hampered when it is developed for some selfish motive.  

It is true when friend is always available for you in all your challenges and in any odd times. But it is not true, when fake reasons are given to keep friendship going.

Friendship based upon truth lasts longer.

 MINEIN :1

When two friends come together for a good cause they create something beautiful.

 TRY THIS ACTIVITY

1.    For this activity, you need one A4 size paper, two pencils, one table and two chairs or you also can sit down to perform this activity.

2.    A paper will be kept between both of you and you both will start drawing on it.  Both will be drawing on the same paper and on the same topic.

3.    It has been observed that Initially people have torn at least one paper, asked for making two halves of the paper, not become easily ready to draw on the same topic. Showed less amount of trust. And that also loosen their confidence.

4.    Let it happen in the beginning for some time; and then give them a minute to think for a while.  And Start again.

5.    Many of them find out way to complete the task. And take the challenge quite well. Some of them still have problems. May be the other friend is taking more paper, more space or something like this or the common complaint is, other person is spoiling the drawing. Just observe whatever is happening.

6.    Discuss and Debrief.

Every reaction, there is a new scope for learning.

MINEIN : 2

A True friend is that who connects.

 What does research say?

:: CHARACTERISTICS OF SOCIAL CONNECTIONS AND HAPPINESS ::

• Loving relationships are crucial to our well-being and happiness.

• Connections and relationships create space for safety and support that help us to explore and learn more. 

• We can build more resources and cope up appropriately with stress and adversity.

• Self - worth is validated. 

• Diverse ideas and influences help us to grow and become successful.

• Fun, care and celebration of good times.

• People with strong social connections have less stress-related health problems, lower risk of mental illness, and faster recovery from trauma. 

• Healthy life-style habits are promoted.

• Psychologist James H. Fowler studied the data of 5,000 people over 20 years and found that happiness benefits other people through three degrees of connection, and that the effects last for a year. 

• He says, " We found a statistical relationship not just between your happiness and your friends' happiness, but between your happiness and your friends' friends' happiness."

• The concept "hedonic adaption" is may be an exception here.  Hedonic Adaption is that, joys of loves and trimphs and sorrows of losses and humiliation fade with time. 

• In contrast to material goods, we are more likely to continue to want our close relationships, even after we attain them, and to continue to derive positive emotions from them. 

• Christakis suggests that, “There is a new kind of hierarchy we might think about as policymakers and social scientists. It’s not just whether you are rich or poor, black or white, urban or rural. It’s also about where you are located in the network.”

• Zen Habits, by Leo Babauta, He mentions that, with connections we also meet with new opportunities, collaborations and emergence of new creation which was not before there. 

• He also explains the importance being open for new people and thoughts. And coming real with other people rather than just a knowledgeable, smart, accomplished and funny person. That is also true but not completely true so, there is a danger that these things may hinder in the process of being a true friend and create true connections. Sometimes being vulnerable is not bad. That shows trust among all other new strange people. And that may also increase the possibility of trustworthy, deeper connections and long-lasting better friendships. 

So be a good friend, be real, be vulnerable, be connected. Have a great friendship day. 

Google Images : 1

Resourses: 

http://zenhabits.net/connect/

http://www.pbs.org/thisemotionallife/topic/connecting/connection-happiness

https://edge.org/panel/nicholas-christakis-the-science-of-social-connections-headcon-13-part-v

Images ( first 2) : From MinEin : Mindfulness Emotional Intelligence Program.

Who I am and Why am I here? Do I have any place in the Family?

DO I HAVE ANY PLACE IN THE FAMILY? 

The story of his life of 11years is like a very big picture which yet to be filled up with colors in it.

He is the one who is trying his best to manage his life. According to him he has a very difficult life.

He is the one who is trying his best to tackle the situations created by people around him.

He is the one who is trying to prove that he is inquisitive.He is the one who is also trying to prove that he is the smart chap. 

He is the one who is trying and searching constantly what others feel about him. And what others think about him.

He also wants answers on his questions as,Whether he is elder one in the family or a child in the family? 

He is only 11 years old and 2yrs and 3months elder than his little sister. 

The whole story of his life of 11years is like a very big picture which yet to be filled up with colors in it. Family is little aware so took step forward. 

He found discrepancy in what they want from him to understanding him. How actually he is and he wants from his life to what they expect from him.

They are adults but he is bright smart too. They are busy but he has his things to do too. They are ready to understand him but only when he agrees with their thoughts but they are not trying to explain him why? He is the one who believes in logic. They don’t think they need to explain it to him every time. They don’t have time; very busy; upbringing of another child and businesses of the family. 

He also has found out his own ways to resolve these issues around him. He says everyone compares so do I. “ You give her then give it to me too. You praise her then praise me too. You understand her and not me why? What did I do?” 

It was asked me by his parents Is there any medicine to mould him? To make him listen to us? To know him we are adults and we think always great and better? though My eyebrows are up automatically, good part is the family is open. 

What do you think friends, if ever you have any similar situation like this in your life or practice; I am trying my best to help the family. All your suggestions are welcomed.

EVERY STEP BECOMES IMPORTANT…
A note on mindfulness and nature trek… have a look. 

While trekking on a small  or a big mountains, we get embroiled by mindfulness automatically. Mindfulness captures  us with every step we want to climb up or climb down as we have to take care while trekking; when we see that there is a slanting steep slope we become more and more alert, and try our best to put our foot forward with extra care. We try to avoid all obstacles, even small stones, or the places from where we may get sliding down. We use all our knowledge whatever we have regarding climbing while trekking. We apply all our concentration and focus to move. We try our best to avoid distractions as we understand about it. And take every step as mindfully as we can. 

When we are completely in our own present moment awareness, We experience all that is happening around at the same time.  The smell of the trees and the grass, the colours of the whole atmosphere, The changing of brightness of the sunlight, The due on the leaves, hues of the sky. That make us think and feel in deep. 

Our all sensory organs are activated. As our nose with the aroma of the grass and  flowers, eyes with all different colours around, ears with the sound of our footsteps, crumpling noise of dry leaves, birds chirping, animal sounds, and any sound we make there, the music of the nature and the music played by our trekking partner,  our feet are connected with earth, and our hands with some trees or big  stones or other group members hands for support. Sometimes support is available but we feel we don’t need it, we can still manage, sometimes support is not available but we need it. What an irony!! 

Recently I had a wonderful experience while trekking, We all me and my family members were visiting a place which was supposed to be untouched and full of scenic beauty. As soon as we entered there, There was a very different aroma of yellow flowers in the valley, the whole valley and the mountain was surrounded by the fragrance of those yellow wild flowers,  I still remember the aroma;  it was little spicy, balmy, little medicinal ; I tried to find out the reason behind it but it’s still pending. 

May be it has some medicinal qualities. But with that all Yellows, the Valley was really looking friendly. As if it was suggesting us to be friendly with it all the time. While taking care of you ; also take care of the valley. Clean it, and save it. And I came across with a very difficult slope, My Nephew helped me getting down from there what a friendly gesture he showed. Wow! 

My brother in law caught our attention towards a fast movement, and it was a small snake, it went under a big stone, and then he went from there, that snake  was unexpectedly fast; it went from there and made us feel free and safe again, My husband said, we actually should not  complain since we had entered in his territory. We tried to find out his species, with what we found, the colour and his speed but we could only thought that he was poisonous. Anyways we were delighted that, we could complete our trek ; and learned a big lesson and that is, sometimes, every step becomes very important.  what say?

The Valley we could see from far...

When we went little near by and could find this beautiful yellows!!!

And that is how they were from our very close...

चेतता नर सदा सुखि .

AN ALERT HUMAN BEING IS ALWAYS HAPPY.

This classical saying is said in GUJRATHI and SANSKRIT; which was said by DADAJI, our friend MANEESH’S FATHER, as blessings to my daughter RAHI. DADAJI AND DADIJI, both had come with us to drop my daughter to her DORM. And they said they will say only one thing to her and that is, “चेतता नर सदा सुखि !!”

It was so meaningful, and important blessings for a daughter who was going to start her stay in the hostel. I remember all those blessings given to me by many of elderly people around me. ..

“यशस्वी हो , i. e. Become Successful. “ , “ सतत पुढे जात राहो . i.e Keep moving forward always. “ , or “पहिला क्रमांक येउ दे. , i.e. May you stand first.”

So many like this can be said , But ALERTNESS is really something. I found that it has a very deep meaning, Meaning of life. It speaks about PRESENT MOMENT AWARENESS, MINDFULNESS, DEEP UNDERSTANDING OF THE SITUATION, AND CONSEQUENCES AT THE SAME TIME. WOW!!

It helps us in everything, while planning a day, driving a vehicle, keeping important things, making lists to remember, scheduling, writing questions, and timing while chitchatting, keeping good health, eating on times, getting your health checked on time, Focusing and Refocusing,  and so long and so forth.

I loved this saying so much that I am bringing in my own life by adding it in to small small things.  I realised that I am not taking that extra effort to keep myself on toes. So I am trying my best to do that. And It is helping.  So let us help ourselves by saying us every time, “चेतता नर सदा सुखि “.